Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Sad To Say

So I am trying to improve the quality of life not just my own life but my families as well. I am trying to pursue my passion for photography all while raising my girls & maintaining a very busy household. It's a lot of work & I have to admit its finally caught up with me. I am exhausted.. worn out.. beat.. & just plain overwhelmed. So I am cutting out the things in my life that I honestly don't have time for or that are causing me stress.

Today is day two of no pumping & day two of realizing it was for the best to switch to formula. I couldn't keep up with the high demand that comes with pumping. I have a two year old to entertain & spend time with.. a newborn who needs mommy happy & energetic.. a husband who needs his wife to not be so damn hormonal & back to her self again. Pumping just caused a LOT of added stress for me.. & brought a lot of tired days that kept me from keeping up with my girls & life in general. I know some people will think less of me for only keeping up with it for 3 months & others will think its awesome I kept at that long.. either way I know it was the best decision not just for me but family as well.

I have also decided to not blog as much.. I feel like a bad blogger if I don't blog EVERYDAY.. I feel like I am going to loose readers & that people are not going to hear what I have to say anymore.. but ya know what so be it. I can't plan my day around what I am going to blog about anymore. If I have some thing to say I will say if not then I won't.. this everyday thing is getting old & fast & I am loosing things to talk about. So I am going to leave it to the important things & throw out all the babbling about the silly things. So if you are a loyal reader you will stay if not oh well see ya later.

I have also decided that FB is absolutely causing me to be a downer almost 75% of the time.. I can't explain why it just does.. I love the connection that it allows me to have with family & friends far away but I am done with others using it as the only way to keep up with us. So I have decided that I am not posting any more pictures on there or writing about what is happening in our lives so much.. if ya wanna now.. pick up the phone or come visit.. ugh!

So with me cutting out those three things I am sure life wont be so stressful so hectic such a downer & I will feel happier. I am trying to focus on my girls & getting them out more & doing things with them. Taking more pictures to capture every moment with them because I am no longer going to take life for granted. I want to focus less on the family who doesn't put forth effort in our lives & focus more on the family who does. I want to spend more time laughing with my husband then feeling frustrated with him. I want to get my butt in shape & not only feel good on the inside but look good on the outside. I want to participate more in helping others & doing maybe a walk for the cure of some sort. {I am dying of laughter at this very moment because my 2 1/2 yr old just came from her room wearing new pants that are on backwards with no diaper or panties & she went to sit in her chair & her butt fell out of them LOL} I want to get my 2 1/2 yr old potty trained. I just want to have more positive in my life & no more negative.. so that is what I am focusing on from now on.. its sad to say that breast feeding didn't work out & that blogging is going to be less & that FB is probably going to be a thing of the past sooner rather then later.. but hey I am okay with that. I have my loving husband, my girls & I am pursuing my passion for photography & right now that makes life great.. then in May we are going to Florida for 2 weeks to see family & to take the girls to Disney World.. the happiest place on earth right.. so its time for some happiness in my life & some sunshine cause lord knows I need it.. this Seattle rain is really getting to me I tell ya!

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